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I went because of Walt Disney. I heard he was inspired to create Disneyland because he was grossed out when he took his kids to some nasty carnivals. So I thought about what would gross me out in the accounting profession, and decided to go to Liberty Tax Service – the carneys of the accounting profession – for inspiration.
I arrived at Liberty Tax at 11:00 a.m. on Presidents’ Day. The open-concept office was austere: two small fake trees, white walls, fluorescent lights. The “waiting room” area had some toys for kids to both play with and contract hepatitis from. I assumed it was a temporary office. I was later told that it’s year-round. Read more
What is accounting really? Read more
Until recently, I thought a thermocouple was something only Bob Newhart and Will Ferrell had to be able to pronounce for a scene in Elf. I had no idea it was a real thing. But it turns out to be a pretty important part of a hot water heater, which turns out to be a pretty important thing if you want people in your household to shower.
But I never wanted to understand how a thermocouple works. Or the pilot light. Or the benefits of installing a hot water heater one way over another. I just want my hot water heater to work so I can wash dishes, clothes, and myself. Fortunately (or unfortunately since I will never get that hour back) my plumber, Bill, really cares a lot about the ins and outs of a hot water heater. He told me all about it. In detail. Read more
Here’s how it works. You pay them a metric butt ton of money, sign ten kiloturds of legal documents, pass an invasive medical prostate exam, and then you get kidnapped. You and the company design the broad parameters of your kidnapping, including a predetermined kidnapping window (usually six weeks long) that begins as soon as you lift the pen from the last legal document.